The law of polarity.
If you’re fighting someone you’re as tied to them as if you’re obeying all of their commands. If you’re hating someone you’re as bound to them as if you’re loving them. All you’ve done is change the polarity. A false escape.
Don’t get me wrong. Sometimes a false escape may be exactly what the doctor ordered.
But sometimes not.
The endgame is to transcend the situation. To grow out of it.
Who knows? There may be some dramatic moment when you confront one or both of your parents. And that may make some sort of difference on some level.
For me, personally, I’d doubt it. The person who needs to be convinced is not them. It’s you. So, if asked, my vote would be to focus your energy on your own growth and empowerment. External and Internal. Having money will probably help. @Michel is right that it’s not some sort of simplistic, magic wand that will easily grant freedom, but it’ll probably still be an improvement.
Also, the steps that you take yourself through as you build up your own money and plans are likely to strengthen the same muscles you’ll use to establish appropriate boundaries and independence.
Any genuine transformation process will surprise the one who has been transformed. You don’t know exactly where this path will take you and, we commenting here definitely also do not, but it’s clear that this change is one that you desire to make.
Hmmm…one other thing. To the degree that it’s possible, remember that your parents are just two human beings. Two grown up children who passed through experiences and developed identities just like you have done. This is true of all human beings. I know that there’s that behaviorally-reinforced sense that they are larger than life, but it’s just a psychological reality. Objectively, they are two grown up babies, just like all adults are.
Challenge yourself to look at them realistically, as neither angels nor demons, as neither absolutely perfect, nor monstrously flawed. They’re people. Try to stay grounded in that. And then gradually work to bring your own power into reality.