Digger’s Journey to becoming a Quantum Mogul


#121

QL ST1 DAY53

Woke up to another day of migraine. It’s like banging my head to a brick wall until it turns to a pulp.
Not sure if it’s because of the headache, but I’ve been getting easily angry today.
Very very very much wanting to join the EQ testers club. Already sent DMs to @SaintSovereign in the past week but still no response. Maybe it’s just not meant to be.
Went to the grocery store to find rows of empty shelves! Somehow I feel like the Zombie Apocalypse is coming. With kids, I really need a lot of supplies. But I just couldn’t over-buy because not only do I have no space to put everything in, but I also can’t spend too much at a time!


#122

I wouldn’t be surprised if you hear from Saint soon enough. My impression is it’s a bit of a backlog on the applications. I sure hope you get in for sure. I’m eager to see what happens with more listening of EQ for me.


#123

QL ST1 DAY54

Woke up early to a headache still. Though thankfully not as severe as the past 2 days. More tolerable like a dull throb and not like a jackhammer.
Nothing much happened today. Kids were rather rambunctious. But when I sternly talked to each of them, they followed my instructions. Maybe due to EmperorV4 giving off a commanding aura? I don’t know. But whatever it was, people with kids would understand that being able to have your kids listen to you and have them do as they’re told is utter heaven.
Went ahead and assembled the 2nd dresser drawers my wife and I bought last Tuesday. While working, kids were again misbehaving. Had my wife shouting at each of them but as long as nobody disturbed me, I didn’t care. Which is good. Cause normally, I get irritated when I hear my kids crying, shouting and fighting with each other. Today, I couldn’t give a fuck. Busy building.


#124

QL ST1 DAY55

Woke up at 3:30am feeling very cold with a slight headache still. As my eyes were still adjusting to the dark, I thought I saw what looked like a giant spider by the window. Not sure if it was a hangover from a dream or my imagination or there was actually a giant spider!

Thought I was about to get sick. Went downstairs to get the thermometer. Whew, good thing it’s a false alarm. However, with all the COVID-19 news, lockdowns, quarantines in place, am I being too paranoid?

Whole day my back and limbs were hurting though. Maybe because of the dresser drawers I assembled yesterday. Whole day I felt so old.


#125

QL ST2 DAY30(mid-day update)

Given that EmperorQ testing is over, I have decided to go back to my previous stack. As before, it would consist of a morning and night playlist.
Mornings:

  • QL
  • AM

Night:

  • QL
  • Mogul
  • AI: Covid-19

Night playlist will be run on ultrasonics so that my wife will also benefit from them. And given that my wife will be listening, I chose Mogul instead of AM.

Additionally, given that single stage subs are already updated to Q-tech, I’m hoping that me and my wife would be able to improve our finances much quicker.


#126

QL ST2 DAY30

Given that I have just started running AM again, there’s nothing much to write about really.

I guess, some would ask, why I would go back to AM? Well, first, it’s been updated to Q. My prior experience to AM and mogul were pretty good. And I wasn’t angry most of the time I was listening to this stack.

While testing for EQ, although my productivity was great, I was angrier than most days. Given the lockdown with kids, it’s really not that good for me right now. Also, my productivity was mainly in line with improving myself. The problem with that was I somehow misaligned my priorities. My work projects took a back seat. And although I am learning a lot and feeling more confident taking my planned certification, it does not put food on the table currently. And with the current economic situation, I am not confident I would get a better job right now.


#127

QL ST2 DAY31

Just in time for QL to get a Q upgrade! Learning and productivity right now hasn’t changed. Although I am still inclined to prepare for my certification, at the back of my mind I can feel my work projects start needing my attention too. This, I think, is a start. When I was on EQ, my focus was solely on improving myself and getting certified.

Also, anger seems to have calmed down a bit. I think by shifting from EQ to AM-Q I feel somewhat calmer now and more able to know when the anger is going to boil over, thus being able to divert my attention to other things. As noted earlier, this is another reason why I decided to go back to this stack.


#128

QL ST2 DAY32(early update)

So I have to wake up early on weekdays because my kids have morning video conferences with their respective teachers. After all of them had met with their classes, I decided to go take a nap.

While lying down, I suddenly thought of concepts from my class in Electrical Power engineering way back in college. Things like 3-phase and single phase distribution, why a 110-volt AC is not really 110volts peak but much more, and more concepts I never bothered about. This may be QL bringing back information I thought I forgot.

While taking my nap, I dreamed about something that made me awfully horny when I woke up. I don’t remember the dream, just that I know I dreamed about something. And when I woke up, I had a hard on. So yeah. Weird.


#129

QL ST2 DAY32

Playful. My wife suddenly told me that she “liked my sense of humor today”. When I asked her what she meant, she said that I was more “playful” today, that I was going out of my way to make her and the kids laugh and be happy.

Looking back, I haven’t felt this playful for some time now. When I was running EQ, I felt more calm but with some inner turmoil just ready to burst. Today, I still got mad at the kids when they misbehaved, but not as much as before running AM. Maybe the social aspect of AM is now more pronounced now that it’s been upgraded to Q?

Productivity still is a work in progress. My wife says she appreciates me helping out with the chores and the kids, but then, where else would I go? If I don’t help out, it’s just going to be more chaotic. And yet, my work projects are barely moving. I did a few minutes work earlier. And will probably work on that tonight. Hopefully, this gets the ball rolling such that by tomorrow, I can do much more.


#130

QL ST2 DAY34

Wasn’t able to update yesterday as I was in a “roll”. Was able to both multitask studying while also working. So while my project was running, I was able to do some problem solving. It actually felt good being able to hit 2 birds with 1 stone yesterday. I did not even realize the time.

Today was more laid back though. I felt very tired and sleepy. And the fact that my kids’ video meetings this afternoon had tech issues, I had to keep running up and down the stairs to solve them (you can’t place kids in the same room when they’re both meeting their teachers). It actually made me even more tired.

I’ll probably try to do some work tonight, but not planning on staying up too late. But then again, I wasn’t planning on pushing myself last night either. So who knows?


#131

Just want to recognize you for what you’re doing for and giving to your children (your young humans). It’s a mitzvah. And it’s important. And it matters A LOT.

I hope you find moments to appreciate yourself and what you are building; and to ENJOY it.

Your future self from 2030 is giving you a nod of respect and a fist bump. Because of what you did he’s able to enjoy having a relationship with his amazing children.

:muscle:t5::fist:t5::fist_left:


#132

Thank you @Malkuth. This means a lot.


#133

QL ST2 DAY36

Again wasn’t able to update yesterday. Maybe because there wasn’t much that happened. Or maybe because I was again multitasking last night. I was so much “in the zone” studying. And at the same time, boiling inside because I can’t make my work project work. Seriously though, it’s a bag of mixed emotions and yet, I was somehow able to concentrate on both. While my project was running, I was able to try solving some problems. And after solving one, I then went back to my project.
In fact, my wife joked if I needed more laptops as I was shifting my attention between 2. Maybe if I had enough cash, I’d probably get my dream hacker’s workstation in my own office. (I mean, I can dream right?)
As for today, temper’s been mild. Not so much probe to anger. Even though my kids have been extremely rowdy and just pushing all my buttons.


#134

QL ST2 DAY37

After spending too much time on my work project, I concluded that it was taking up too much time and the ROI would be too low for it to be actually useful to our team. I sent an email to my boss this morning telling him so, and even detailing the steps I did in order to get the results and my recommendations. Still waiting for a response. I even sent him a message on Skype telling him about the email and asking him to let me know if he still wishes to pursue it or not. All I got in reponse “Ok. Will do.”
It seems he’s not that vested in it even though he’s the one who told me to start it in the first place. But then, a part of me is hoping that he may just be busy with other matters as I keep getting emails from our PM system notifying us of changes he made regarding various documents and such.
As for my exam, still pushing on with learning. I actually feel excited when I open the curriculum page. The nerd in me really wants to do well!


#135

QL ST2 DAY39

Major headache yesterday till last night. Was barely able to move well.

Today was much better. Had to go to the grocery to stock up on supplies. Ended chatting casually with the cashier and even joking a little.

Nothing much to report about. Although I’ve been having a lot of thoughts about work and the topics I’ve been studying and how they can inter-relate with each other. Feel like there’s an idea that might come out of all this thinking. Just trying to be patient and not forcing anything.

Little reconciliation seems to be cropping up as my anger’s starting to come out unrestrained. Although I’ve been able to reel it in shortly after an outburst.


#136

QL ST2 DAY40

Not really sure whether or not this is reconciliation. I feel like “meh”, like nothing, neither hoping/expecting for something nor am I willing to work on something right now. Nonchalance I think is the more appropriate term.

Been angry at my kids, but then they were misbehaving. And yet somehow, I feel like I’m looking to add more fuel to the fire when I get mad lately. Like I’m looking for excuses to keep getting angry. Not sure why.

Been thinking of adding PSITQ or starkq to my stack but with the current situation, I’m actually torn since I’m stuck home with my family and very rarely leaving the house.

So yeah. Maybe reconciliation.


#137

QL ST2 DAY41

And there’s now a new experimental sub for StarkQ. Talk about reconciliation causing sub hopping?

Anger. Mostly. As kids are not behaving. Knowing how to push my buttons. Ended up shouting after my kids did not behave. Is it recon? Or is it really just me?

Lazy. Yep. Been feeling tired and lazy all day. Had to work and forced myself to. But only ended up doing barely minimal work.


#138

QL ST2 DAY42

So lately I’ve been experiencing mild to moderate headaches when I wake up and at night. Normally Advil or Tylenol solves this but maybe it’s because of running my stack too much. As @SaintSovereign mentioned, maybe it’s time to cut it back a bit:

So starting today, I decided to run each sub in my stack 3 times. Before I just ran my stack in a loop. Now, as before, I still have 2 stacks. One at night, one during the day. They will be as follows:
DAY:

  • QL ST2 x3
  • AM x3
  • AI-Covid19 x1

Night (only ultrasonics):

  • QL ST2 x3
  • Mogul x3
  • AI-Covid19 x2

Also, depending on how I feel, I may add EF ST1.

So onto my journal.
Given that my wife wanted to have a chance to go out, and that she didn’t know how to drive, we packed the kids in the car and drove to the grocery store. While she went inside, kids and I were left in the car with the kids watching a DVD. Normally, they would become rowdy and restless after some time. And this often times gets me mad especially when one starts crying. Today, anger wasn’t really much of an issue. In fact, come to think of it, I don’t recall getting really mad today. (Yey me!)

Both my right wrist and left elbow are starting to hurt again. Decided to play 3 loops of EF ST1. Can’t really say discomfort went away as it is too early to tell. May continue with EF tomorrow.

Head was starting to hurt again prior to writing this entry. But since I both stopped listening to any sub and also got an Advil, my headache’s gone. So yeah. Maybe Q is really that strong that I need breaks?


#139

QL ST2 DAY43

So my left elbow and right wrist still hurt. Extending my left arm hurts a bit. Especially when I need to move heavy stuff. So I ran 3 loops of EF ST1. I feel like it’s the muscles around the joints that are problematic. Hopefully EF can help with this.

So woke up without any headaches. And I don’t have one now. So maybe changing the listening process seems to help. Although, at the back of my mind, I always felt that more results to more. Like more practice gets better results, more studying makes better grades, etc. So here’s to hoping that in this case less is more.

Feeling a bit sad since I cannot play with my family too much without wincing. Also, anger has been on-off today. Hopefully this is just reconciliation.


#140

QL ST2 DAY44

So my wrist does not hurt as much. But my elbow still does. Actually, it hurts even more. However, it only hurts when I am holding/lifting something or when I stretch my arm. So most probably it is a muscle.

Not really sure if EF ST1 is helping with the healing. But then, maybe it’s still a bit early.

Been feeling very lazy today. So lazy, I did not want to even think about work. In fact, at today’s meeting, I actually forgot that it was my turn to present. We normally take turns presenting something at the end of the meeting. So yeah. Was a bit embarrassed but, idk. Part of me didn’t give a fuck really.

Kicking myself a bit since I’ve been looking at hints to some practice problems I’ve been working on as preparation for my certification exam. I mean, sometimes I just feel like I need a little push in the right direction as I don’t know where to start. But now that I know what to do, I feel stupid not thinking about it first.

Man idk. Somehow, I feel like I want to try StarkQ but don’t know if it’s a good fit for my goals, needs and situation. I wanted an empire so I tried out Ev4 and EQ, but it got me mad a lot of times that, as a father and husband, is not really good for my family, especially given the lockdown.