TMB - EoG/E:HoM


#201

@ALMIGHTY Stage 2 is the one I wanted to tag you for. It’s made me feel like utter shit.

How was your experience?


#202

Hope you enjoyed man aha.


#203

Ahahah,

St2. I thought that’s what you’re gonna talk about

I know, I was depressed at some point for 5 days in a row.

I think it’s good. For me it was about “can I get what I want???” and it ended with “most likely yes, there are good chances, and I best give it my all and …” (more came later).

So anyways, best get to the root of that feeling, and see what’s creating it. Address those. See what your deep beliefs about yourself and your life are, and about what you want. This is the best way to take action, journaling, writing, drawing, etc IMHO. And talking to someone (not just anyone though) can also help.


#204

I just don’t understand why Stage 2 is so difficult. I thought it would have been Stage 1 but this one is still running even though I’ve dropped it.

I must be mentally weaker since the depressive thoughts have made me feel incapable of doing better. I’m trying though.

I feel so far behind in life compared to other people.

I’ve barely had sex, even though I’m with my boyfriend who I love I don’t feel like I’m experiencing the most I can as we are pretty seperated due to us not working on a sexual level.

I feel far behind in dance since I’ve still got so much to learn yet I’m teaching choreography and want to be better.

I feel hella lonely friendship wise. Lockdown is occurring in the UK so talking to people is only through social media which honestly is pissing me off. I’m realising how much time I’m wasting on it and not doing more productive stuff.

I tried to take class today but I got so frustrated with not doing dance earlier in life so that I could be better at it.

All that shit.


#205

@ALMIGHTY
@Brandon

Im in stage 1 and just gone past 40 days …
Im reading the discussion about stage 2 and i feel like staying on stage 1 lol …


#206

Hahaha, when are you dropping Stage 1 for Stage 2? How long do you plan on doing each stage?

You’ll be fine, might feel like shit for a while but it’ll be helping you. I’m just complaining a lot haha. I just need somewhere to vent and that’s why this part of the forum is useful and people are helping me understand what’s happening since they’ve been through the same.


#207

Since i read your comment about stage 2 i dont want to go near lol just joking.
I will probably give each stage 3 months. In the long term the longer i run stage 1 the better it will be in the end of this journey.


#208

Haha, you’ll be fine!

90 days is good. I was literally thinking yesterday about how each stage should be ran longer. Clearly I have a lot of shit to deal with and heal myself from but I can’t deal with the constant nagging - hence why I won’t use Dragon Reborn yet.

I’m also too impatient, especially now from Khan - I’m getting more impatient with things.

Keep going pal, I’m excited to see your results.

I ended up adding Stage 3 part way through Stage 2 (so I did a total of 40 days) and I find it better that way. I would have done longer but again I can’t help the nagging.


#209

It’s just the way it is

I can’t relate to some of what you are saying but that’s okay we are different in some ways all of us

You will find your path, you will get through this. Just keep at it, and focus on the positive things more. And find solutions to your problems. I hope this helps.

This is just Khan helping you find out who you are IMO. Growth hurts, fam.

Friends… I’m down to listen to you vent at least whenever. =)

Nah, go for ST2. This is part of the journey…

or listen to your intuition if you feel you’re not ready for it nvm, but if I were you I’d go for ST2. This is what you came for isnt it :wink:


#210

@ALMIGHTY

I’m feeling better today. The thoughts are still there but I feel that I’m getting happier now that I’m running Stage 3 and Stark and have had a rest from Stage 2.

Your line: Growth hurts, fam.

Really just hit me. It does hurt. Healing hurts but it is what it is. Worth it in the end. I can feel it. Khan is doing a good job even if I am just venting and letting everything I feel shit about go.

I will be a Khan. I am a Khan. I am in control even if I don’t feel like I am.

Thanks for the love brother.


#211

You are very welcome

I would tbh just keep going with ST2. Whatever it is as soon as you can get your beliefs aligned the right way you will feel better. So, this is just working towards that. I say stick with st2 because I tried other things in the past and it just made it slower. And whatever you do I suggest you dont jump to st4, it can be a bit painful unnecessarily and confusing, for me it was at least

so yah, I suggest sticking with st2, just riding, and really grabbing pen and paper and going through your belief system and what you’re doing with your life so that you feel more aligned. But I do recall pretty much everyone reporting a shitty time on st2 and I told you mine was not so good either esp last days I was depressed for a while, but what I’ve written here helped a lot. In the end for me knowing I can get what I want really made me happy and I went for it all in.


#212

I definitely won’t be jumping to Stage 4 just yet. I’ve been using Stage 3 for two weeks, you really think I should drop it for Stage 2? I started doing that reflection stuff you suggested.

How many loops do you suggest per night? I listen during the night and I’m also currently listening to Stark.


#213

Well that’s what I’d have done before; but now if you already did 40 days no worries I guess later you’ll come back to it in ST4. :smiley:


#214

Yeah I did about 40 days of Stage 2, not sure how many of Stage 1, it was a little longer than 30 days I think but it was mixed with other stuff like Stark and my custom I believe.

I did about 10 days of Stage 2 with Stage 3. I’m going to stick Stage 3 out and then let Stage 4 take over in about 14 more days whilst continuing Stage 3 and Stark in my stack before dropping Stage 3.


#215

Feeling much better today. I have a plan of action today for what I want to complete today but I’m stuck at home waiting for my boyfriends parcel to come.

He bought me a PS5 for Christmas and wanted me to have it during lock down (that isn’t the parcel I’m waiting for today) but it comes in a couple days which I’m excited for - excited to give it a whirl and play the new Call of Duty too.

Anyway, my emotions feel more in check today and I feel happier. I have had my loops at x3 for Khan and Stark and I’m alternating each day. Must be helping the processing.

Anyway, plan of action today since I’m sick of not being creative and sitting at home just watching TV - Even though I enjoy watching AHS: Coven with the boyfriend, is to film 2 dance videos. One in the studio and one outside where I can get some good content. Hopefully it works out because I’m trying to get my work out there. I’ve been procrastinating on doing it but suddenly it’s just hit me to do it and not care what people think. I truly think both Khan and Stark are really kicking in now - x3 might be my sweet spot.

Gonna listen to Libertine today.
In regards to Libertine…something told me not to message the boy I’m interested in and message his girlfriend instead - she knows he dances with me but not that he’s helping me out, and Jesus she’s a breath of fresh air. I really like her, I didn’t think she’d be as talkative as she is.

As I’ve been talking to her though he’s been a lot more talkative. Blunt and to the point but more interactive than normal…I wonder.

Something tells me he’s not straight, but we’ll see.


#216

The temptation right now to buy and use Dragon Reborn Stage 1 even for 1-2 loops is real.

Gahhhhhhhhhh.


#217

Am personal holding off, my end is even worst wont be using this till am done with a wealth and relationship custom which i will both run for one year
After that i will make a health custom amd add this in lol so am really far from using this

But i really want to use it


#218

Oh also.

Normally I don’t remember my dreams but I just had a nap and I keep getting similar dreams.

Why is Ghostface from Scream continually in them? I’m a massive Scream fan and watched Scream 4, 3, and 2 as well as the third season about a week or so ago and all I’m getting constantly is chase scenes (that don’t happen in the movie) and aren’t necessarily chasing me happening.

Just before the kill happens I wake up. Nearly everytime and I can feel the panic in my sleep (Lord please never put me in that situation…).

Might be nothing to read into and might just be the fact I’ve constantly researched and been looking at the franchise since I watched the films due to the 5th being announced and all that…but why that particular dream or face? Is it really just because of this research or whatever or is it the processing of the subs.


#219

I was going to hold off but I also know I need more healing even though all I’ve done is complain about healing :joy: but if it’s what I need then I should go through with it right? Am I just justifying this to myself haha.

That is a long time for sure man. Shiny object syndrome is real.


#220

It definitely is, i want to buy dragon reborn but no is no lol going be put that bad boy in a custom
Feel ill just run some healing ultimas at the end of the year an call that a " a budget dragon reborn" lol